Wednesday, January 4, 2012

12 Wedding Myths - BUSTED!

Happy New Year!  In the spirit of 2012...we are sharing 12 myths that need some busting as we kick off another engagement and planning season.

Boldly Chic Couple: Shira & Jarrod

1. Couples should begin planning immediately after they get engaged.

No way!  Enjoy your new status and relax!  Yes, vendors do book quickly - but not so quick that they are completely unavailable.  That is called a sales tactic, my friend.  And, while urgency is important, so is a planning timeline customized to your wedding.  Don't jump head in trying to tackle it all right away.  Spread it out over time, book what is most important to you first and learn to stay on track in a non-stressful way.

2. It will take at least one year to plan a wedding.

This just isn't the case anymore.  Now, of course, more time always gives you more room to spread out the planning. But, with the right professionals on your side, a wonderful and seamless wedding can come together in much less than one year.  While venues and photographers book the quickest, there are so many great options available now that the rush has subsided somewhat.

3.  DIY-ing will save me thousands of dollars.

It really won't.  If you want to DIY to simply add the custom touch - that is a very good reason to use this tactic.  However, unfortunately, what many brides and MOB's learn after the fact is that they really only saved a nominal amount of dollars (I'm talking like $200).  In the meantime, they lost a huge amount of hours crafting right before the big day and creating stress all around.  DIY-ing is great - do not get me wrong - but keeping it on a small scale is the smart route to take.

4.  Family members will love to help on wedding day.

They might think they will...until you give them the job of carrying your 20 boxes of decorations (each weighing 40lbs) to and from the reception, 10 stories up, with no elevator.  I have seen it....and it is not pretty.  If possible, leave it to your hired vendors (you have paid them, after all) and let your family enjoy the day celebrating with you.

5.  We must have favors for every guest.

It is always a nice thought to send your guests home with a little something.  But, put yourself in their shoes.  How many times have you taken a favor that you got at a wedding, looked at it and said "What the heck am I going to do with this?!".  Unless it can be eaten or it is in the form of a charity donation, favors are no longer loved by the masses. So, don't drive yourself crazy trying to come up with something for everyone.  Surprise them in other ways throughout the reception!

6.  Hiring your friends is the same as hiring an experienced, professional wedding vendor.

Sorry, folks.  It just will never be the same.  You won't get the same product, the same service or the same results.  Always think long and hard about hiring a friend for any part of your wedding - photography, videography, makeup, stationery, etc. - because even if it saves you some money (even worse, if they are doing it for free), you may really regret it years down the road.  There is always a true professional that falls into your budget.  You just have to know where and how to find them.

7.  Buffet dinners are so much cheaper than plated dinners.

It is funny how rumors get started...and this one is definitely just a rumor.  After you actually run the numbers, in most cases (depending on the catering company), they are nearly the same.  Think about it - when caterers can't control portion sizes (which is what happens at the buffet table), they must account for more portions!  More portions = more food = more money!  So, plated meals are portion-controlled and can many times be priced lower because of that reason.  Be sure to do your research and talk to your caterer before deciding in your mind that a buffet is the way to go.

8.  It is necessary to invite guests who invited me to their wedding.

Um, no.  We all lose touch, we all get married at different times and we all have different size families to accommodate.  So, don't think it is mandatory to invite anyone who doesn't make sense.  If you have truly lost touch and have no way to get in contact with them - that is a sure sign they probably should not be on the list.  You guest list should include individuals who know you in the "now".

9.  Destination weddings are easier to plan and less expensive.

This may be true if you and your fiance are the only ones present at the wedding.  But, when you begin to host even 20 guests, prices might really shock you.  The dollar doesn't stretch as far as soon as you go beyond the U.S. borders - especially when it comes to a wedding.  Not only that, but when guests go out of their way to travel and spend their money on accommodations, it is somewhat expected that you will host a welcome event in addition to the main wedding events.  Don't assume this is the easiest, least stressful and most inexpensive route.  It probably won't be.

10.  The bride and groom need to make sure guests have transportation to and from the wedding.

Many couples assume they need to take care of this detail - but it is not necessary.  Nice?  Of course.  Mandatory?  Not at all.  

It is understandable that the couple wants all the guests (especially out-of-towners) to get to bed safely following the reception.  But, guests should understand that if no transportation is provided by the couple, they need to get themselves home.  It is just that simple.

11.  Hiring a wedding planner will take all control away from the couple.

I had to include this one...because it hits so close to home.  I cringe when I hear a potential client express this exact concern during an initial consultation.  Why?  Because a wedding planner should never take away a single ounce of control or make even one decision for a bride and groom.  They are there to listen, guide and assist - not boss.  They will lead you, ask the tough questions and help you see the options.  

12.  Weddings are as stressful and expensive as they look on all those TV shows.

Please watch those with a grain of salt.  It is all for television sake.  Brides are over (and I mean over) dramatic, prices are either way to high or extremely way to low and the story lines are unrealistic.  I, myself, am a huge sucker for those shows - but when I watch I just know that there is nothing I can truly take away and relate back to my clients or the weddings we plan at BCE.  So, enjoy the show - but don't ever think that will be your situation! 

If you are planning a 2012 wedding - keep all these busted myths in mind throughout the process.  And, have fun with it!  It will be over before you know it - and you might be shocked to discover even more myths along the way...

Boldly Yours,


Interprintations said...

Great post!

The DIY myth gets me every time. Go with a pro, and save yourself HOURS of your precious time. That is SO valuable in the weeks leading up to the big day!

Events By Love said...

This was a Great post! Very educational for the bride... I love the bit about the Reality Shows!

Stephanie said...

Love this post Lori!! So true!! Especially about the DIYers! Weddings, Consulting & Planning, Event Coordinators, free websites